You'll Understand When You're Older.

Well boys and girls, Tater and Tot are no longer residing at the Graves/Vento/Lauren household. It was time to get rid of one of the roommates...and well, they smelt the worst. Not really. I mean, they are gone, but that's not why. I decided that they would get more attention and love at Judy's instead of being locked in my bedroom where nobody goes during the day. Now they have to work twice as hard to kill me...Muahaha...Yea, I went there with the maniacal laugh...

On another note, Google hates me. I believe I am the only person on the planet that has typed in google.com multiple times and come up with an error that reads: address not found. Seriously? you can't find GOOGLE? REALLY?

So, as if hide and seek google isn't annoying enough, my computer has a mind of its own. It decides when it will shut off. I have no say in the matter. I made the mistake of sneezing in the middle of my google story and apparently I made Compy here a little angry and poof, shut down. Yay for autosave!

Yes, I do have A.D.D....I've got these candles, right? I got them for Christmas like...I don't know...three years ago? Anyway, one of them is red and white. It's called Peppermint White Chocolate. Makes sense with the colors. I'm fine with that. It's the other one that makes me nervous. This candle is yellow, orange and blue. It's called Cupcake Surprise. I've lit the candle and it smells great, but it's only gotten to the end of the yellow. I don't know what the surprise is, but I do know I'm afraid of that blue layer... SURPRISE! YOUR CANDLE SMELLS LIKE DOG SH*T!

Your Mother and I Think It's About Time You Get a Job...

I've realized that my blog entries have been rather...mundane lately. I want to jazz them up a bit, but in order to do that, I would need drama in my life. Lord knows that is the last thing I'm going to wish for. Unfortunately for all of you dedicated readers out there...you know who you are... my life will continue (hopefully) to be rather uneventful, but in a good way. If you would like, I could tell you all what I ate during the day, or explain to you what happened in the episode of Smallville that Chris and I watched, but I'm sure that's not high on your list of things that intrigue you.

I'm enjoying the fact that I can go to sleep at night without dreading the next morning, or wondering if someone is going to do something so aggrivating that I will want to lock myself in my bedroom (which doesn't actually have a lock). Excitement in life is a good thing, on occasion, but I find that it's rare for my life's excitement to be positive. My major concern right now is where to find work. Maybe I'll become a hydraulic hose fabricator, or a senior logistics engineer...or I could take over third shift at McDonald's...I think that is the most likely of the three. I have found that MichiganWorks.com is pretty much a useless website unless you want to work in a foundry or as a nurse. Even if you do, and these jobs are listed, chances are these places aren't hiring. So far, 3 of the jobs that I found, and was looking forward to possibly getting, didn't actually exsist. One of them was even at a fast food joint. I'm not sure if it says something about the economy, or something about myself, when I can't even get hired to flip burgers for a few months until I can find what my parents (and grandparents) call a "real job." Maybe my grandma was right telling me to sign up for the military...I could totally pull that off, right?...ha

I also want to note that I was just reading an ad for a job as a pizza cook at a local 'bistro and pizzaria' and misread the job requirements. Instead of reading "Applicant should be dependable," I read (and I sh*t you not) "Applicant should be DESPERATE." Three cheers to seeing what you want to see..

When You Pay the Bills, You Can Make the Rules.

Alright guys...since my mother is moving away, and taking our cellphone plan with her, I need to get my own. I also need a whole new phone. I decided to go ahead and get a straight talk phone with my taxes. The question is, which one? That's where you guys come in. Do I get the LG290C? or R451C? Google them... Do it or else.. I'd add a link, but blogger is stupid. Kthxbai as the lolcats would say.

That's It! You're Grounded!

OH EM GEE! The weather was amazing today! Between the cleaning Miss Heather and I got done, and the minute amount of vitamin D that I managed to absorb while getting some fresh air, I was in a fabulous mood. It almost feels like spring is right around the corner. It's going to suck big time when the weather goes back to being crappy, wet, and cold. If that's not a bright and shiny outlook on life, I don't know what is.

So, since the last time I opened the window to my little world through my previous blog, I've managed to destroy my appearance...and for a reasonably low price! I don't mind changing the color of my hair to some random, unnatural color, but when it comes to a haircut, there is a fine line between a good cut and a mullet. Mine is a mullet. Admit it Chris. Fortunately, hair grows back. Unfortunately, it's just a bit too short to throw up into a ponytail until it does. Oh well, I suppose. It'll just help me fend off all of those boys who have been chasing me....heh

I've decided that I absolutely despise the song "Two is Better Than One" by Boys Like Girls. No matter what mood I'm in, if I hear that song...I cry. It's stupid, and that makes me angry. Tonight I heard it after speaking to my dad. He told me that so far, at about 7:30 PM, this is the first night that he hasn't cried over things with my mom. I could tell that he was choking up about it and almost lost it myself. I'm not sure what is going to happen after she moves. It's going to be weird because I've been waiting for years for her to leave him, but I never thought she would. Now that she is, I'm angry with her for doing such an awful thing to my father, after 24 years of marriage. I guess if she doesn't love him anymore, she shouldn't be with him, but not only is she leaving him, she is abandoning me. That's my selfish view on it at least. I can't see her coming back if (when) I get married and have kids. I can't imagine that she would even talk to me a whole lot. March 1st she is packing up her clothes, and her dog, and taking off for Washington, where she will pretend to start a new and better life, with my dad's money, and the car she can't afford the payment on. Good luck, Mom.

Pip tried to kill me today. He took a knife to my side. That's a lie. He just used my side as a launch pad. There was blood everywhere. That's a lie, too. It still hurt. Don't judge me. If you ask me nicely, I might show you the bloody scar that he left behind. It's pretty epic.

As for my guineas (renamed Tater and Tot thanks to Shaun), nothing exciting has happened. I think they got bored with their plans to take over the world, or my bedroom. Then again...maybe that is part of the plan. They are trying to throw me off by making me think they're no longer interested. Clever..very clever. I'm on to you and your evil plan.

Now that I've officially turned my blog into an over dramatic, yet mildly humorous diary, I shall retire to slumber land. No, I don't mean the furniture store. Goodbye, horses.
(Great song by the way...Would you f*ck me? I'd f*ck me. I'd f*ck me hard.)

This one's too sappy for a parental quote...

So, as most of my blogs have been rather pointless, this one is going to be used to tell Miss Heather, Miss Becky, and Sir Chris just how much I appreciate EVERYTHING they have done for me. They didn't have to open their home to me, and they definitely didn't have to let me stay here rent free until I get back on my feet. They have put up with my constant complaining about Sandie, my awful sense of humor, and my occasional attempt to make a meal worth consuming. It means so much to me that they would do so much to help me, since they hardly knew me when I first moved in. In fact, Chris and Becky didn't know me at all! I can't imagine where I would be right now if they weren't helping me out.

Some day I will do my very best to repay you guys for everything that you've done for me, for the numerous meals you have provided, the countless nights of epic entertainment, and just the company in general. I wish there was a way I could tell you just how great I think you all are, but, as cliche as it sounds, there are no words strong enough to express my gratitude. I love you guys!

I've met a lot of interesting characters since I've been here, too, and I believe they all deserve to be mentioned. John, you are by far my favorite when you're drunk. Daniel, I don't know you very well, but from what I do know, you're very sweet (at times). Doug (the original), you have a special ability to make me very uncomfortable. Be proud of that. It's not as common as you would think. As for the rest of you, you don't read my blog, so you can sit on it...whatever IT is...

What Did You Say To Me, Young Lady?

Dear Diary,

Today I learned that I have a stalker.

Oh, whoops...wrong site...uuh...

Dear Followers, (and Chris...and Doug apparently)

I have an announcement to make. There is a correction to the information in my previous post. I'd like to let everyone know that the highlight of my week, and every single night, is watching Smallville with Chris. I swear he didn't guilt me into saying that...

Now, back to the business at hand. I have found that it's not my guinea pigs that are plotting against me. Or should I say not JUST my guinea pigs. Come to find out, all of the animals in the house are out to get me. I'm thinking Sandie may have put them up to it, but the jury is still out on that one. One of the orange cats tried to sabotage me with my own Diet Coke around 10:30 this morning. The perpetrator tried to play it off by blaming his clumsy nature, but I know the truth. If it weren't for that mangy cat (I'm kidding. I love you, kitty) I would have been able to wear my favorite jeans to coffee with my mom. You know, the ones with all the words on them that faded so much that all you can see is the word 'red.' Yea, those ones. But nooooo, I had to wear the ones that don't fit quite right. The ones that are tight on my thighs but won't stay on my butt. Mmmhmm...you guys know what I'm talking about. Blast my oddly shapen body for having barely any curves!! Lucky for everyone that crossed paths with me today, I didn't let my soggy jeans ruin my day! I pressed on, and took some really good photos :-D

Don't Make Me Ask You Twice!

I swear my guinea pigs are plotting against me. While I was napping today, I could hear them chirping away. I'm pretty sure I heard one say 'sufficate'... All I know is, I'm sleeping with one eye open tonight.

I've decided that my life is really boring. The highlight of my week was getting to leave the house and go to Walmart at 1 in the morning. If I'm lucky, I might get to leave again on Wednesday! I need a job...